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By the way, I know how overwhelming this situation is. I have been TTC for 4 years, so I really can relate to what you are saying. Still, as I mentioned earlier, every cloud has a silver lining. Keep that in mind going forward. Life presents a few challenges, which we can overcome. By overcoming, and staying positive, you get to develop your self-control, which is key in any sphere of our lives. Read up on a good book, or binge-watch a show, you have love. These two I do on religiously, and I consider them essential in helping me reduce my stress