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Life after a newborn

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This topic contains 4 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Tifanny 2 years, 4 months ago.

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  • #2876

    Trisha
    Participant

    You may find (or your partner may sense) that the intensity of the bond you’re developing with your new baby makes you somewhat less emotionally available. On the other hand, a new baby can bring such joy to your lives that it enhances sexual intimacy. If your partner is feeling jealous or intimidated by your relationship with the baby, try giving frequent reassurance that your love and need for your partner hasn’t changed. And make sure that your partner has plenty of opportunity to care for and bond with the baby as well. Sharing the joys and frustrations of parenthood can be very rewarding and can even intensify your romantic feelings for each other. How can we find the time for sex with a baby around? If possible, set aside time to be alone for sex. If you find you’re distracted and always listening for the baby, perhaps you can arrange to leave the baby with a family member or reliable sitter for an hour or two. If you can’t, then you’ll have to work around the baby’s naps or bedtime. Your baby will no doubt wake up at the most inconvenient time. It helps to keep your sense of humor. And be patient. Things will get easier when your baby starts sleeping through the night. And you’ll be less tired then, too.

    #2899

    Polina Delany
    Participant

    Yeah? That happens. I’ve heard of it. Thanks for highlighting the issue. Since, last year, when we stopped trying conceive naturally. We also had a break for having sex. It was pretty rough and waiting for me. But, we eventually talked and try having it once after a while. So, we don’t get stressed over much…

    #2907

    chicago
    Participant

    Trisha good to see you over here. You always come up with an interesting question mark. That’s so genuine thing now a day. Everybody is suffering from these phenomena. Then at last women complain their husbands that they don’t love them anymore. They consume their time with kids. They don’t bother husband’s needs further. Then come to husband, he began to earn money more and more. He became so bust in his daily life. If he wants relaxes he look around for a girlfriend. In this way houses breaks. Families destroy. For kids, both of them have suffered and made their routine tough and difficult than at the end kids began to blame them. so please try to think about each other as well as for kids. You all make a family complete.

    #6591

    Stormi
    Participant

    Your parenting styles cancel each other out. It’s nice to think you’d share child-rearing philosophies. But it’s often hard to predict how you’ll feel about sleep, food, and discipline until you’re smack in the middle of your fourth night up with baby. This is not the ideal time to discover that while you favor a sleep-training method that lets your child cry, your spouse really can’t deal with tears for any amount of time. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you can’t make a hot date. Get a sitter, shave your legs, and flirt a little. As for increasing the frequency of sex on nondate nights, experienced parents recommend making sure your bedroom is baby-free at bedtime. “There’s nothing like rolling on top of a toy caterpillar that starts to play ‘Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star’ to kill the mood. Couple time is now family time. You’re always together, but no longer alone. Whether you’ve been a couple for years or just met and wanted to have a baby quickly, jumping from a twosome to a family is challenging. Making the leap from coupledom to baby-makes-three is exciting, exhilarating, and wonderful. It’s also exhausting, exasperating, and worrisome—a combination that can be toxic to the romantic relationship that made you parents in the first place. The bad news first: Maintaining a marriage post-baby takes a lot of time and energy, exactly what you’ve got the least of right now. Now the encouraging news: Working on your relationship pays off in spades. Without all that energy expended (read: wasted) growing resentful of each other, you’ll have more to spend enjoying one another.

    #6607

    Tifanny
    Participant

    Once the baby arrives, you may ask, “Whatever happened to sleeping in, spontaneity, late-night movies, and holding hands?” Baby happened, that’s what. No matter how much you each wanted this new little bundle of joy, you need to be prepared for rough waters ahead. The changes that occur at the birth of your first child are immeasurable. At some point you will realize that life will never be the same again. This stage includes an emotional roller coaster such as you could never have imagined. You go from the joy of seeing your new creation for the first time to the fear of being inadequate as a parent. You also feel the pride of watching your child develop and learn each new skill to the loneliness of feeling disconnected from your spouse. And on and on the roller coaster goes. This new stage of your relationship requires that you change certain expectations of how much energy you will have at the end of the day for conversation or housework. How you define closeness and intimacy may need to be changed as well. Be aware of changes in your personal emotional needs. Mom often begins to develop an emotional need for family commitment that was not there before. She may need to see her husband actively participating in the parenting. She will feel close to him as she watches him in his role as a father.

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