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I am 43..

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    Sammy Lors

    Hello all. I am Sammy and I am 43 years old.My first pregnancy came with my first attempt at 42,the last June. My joy was so great that I was looking forward to the future and imagining the birthplaces that would come in mid-March. I was deeply obscured …. Ultrasound at 12.5 weeks showed that the embryo had died since the 6th week. Big shock! One of the hardest days of my life … At that night I could not sleep at all. For me it was a funeral. Two days later they took off and they cleaned me up. It took me months to recline. My husband was more shocked and depressed. For about a month, he refused to discuss the issue of this failed pregnancy. Fortunately, with my help, we have re-launched and started our efforts since January.We gathered our strengths and resumed our efforts. In the first few months, my husband didn’t want to visit a specialist. He believed we could do it ourselves. Eventually in April we went to a specialist. He gave me a paper with the chances of getting pregnant at this age and tell us to think for a egg/embryo donation or adoption. The paper contained names and prices … When I told him that my grandmother gave birth to her last child at 52, she answered that her date of birth was something wrong for years.To her great surprise and with the help of Clearblue 2 weeks after the visit I was again pregnant. Tears of joy filled our eyes … But unfortunately our joy did not last long. I lost it after a week… I changed my doctor and I just took examinations to see my ovarian age.We will have the results at the end of the month. The first meeting with the new doctor, he was very polite, he explained everything to us with the smile and did not disappoint us. His assessment at the time was that the IVF at my age had the same success rates as inseminations. They also did hysterosalping, which I understood was good. I do not have clogged trumpets. The fact that I was pregnant again is encouraging.I know that I am IN a difficult age and that the difficulties are huge, but I try to have positive thoughts.If one of you is on the same age and tries 43 for a child, I would ask her to share her experiences, whatever they may be.I look forward to reading your comments.


    Hi, Sammy. Welcome to the group. It is great that you decided join our online family by sharing your story. I know how heart-breaking it must have been for you. Experiencing two losses in a row is surely heart-breaking itself. However, It is great that you understand, at 43, pregnancy, although possible, is usually difficult. I am happy to hear that you understand the difficulties that come with age. I have been TTC for 4 years now, I know it sounds so saddening. But, I am trying to keep myself sane by being positive about it. I also think you have great chances of success this time. I hope so. Regarding positivity, you could not be more right on this one, though. As usual, it is key to stay positive. Anyways, sorry if I had rambled on too much. I wish you the very best of luck. I hope everything will work out for you this time. IVF, can really be effective for you right now. Sending you baby dust, SAmmy.


    I do not know the reason to why you has to wait all that long. To be honest sometimes I am getting amused. Like what was someone doing since their early twenties. I ma not trying to judge you. Because I am shocked that at the age of 42 is when you gave your first attempt. just because your grandma managed to be pregnant at 52 does not mean it will happen to you too. The food that you are eating is different to the ones she ate. your lifestyle and hers are totally different. So now at your age being pregnant will be kinda tough. As you can already see what is happening. It is good news that you can be pregnant. But unfortunately you cannot keep the pregnancy. If this continues you can try something else. Like surrogacy. Let someone else help you carry the pregnancy. But still there are other ways of being pregnant. Like what the doctor said. About embryo transfer and the likes. The decision now lies with you. Which option you feel well best suit you.


    It seems to me that you do not struggle enough. The only problem in your case is keeping the pregnancy. You had two pregnancy and lost both in a miscarriage. I think that should be the center of everything. Why the miscarriage. I s something wrong with your immune system or something? Or your uterus cannot keep a baby. You have a lot of questions to ask yourself dear. Although there are other alternative that you can follow. But it could have been better if you really knew where the problem lies. Then from there you can focus on finding the solution. Remember you age is also ticking by. So you should hurry all things up. I am not saying like you get pregnant tomorrow. But the earlier you realize yourself the better. Now that you have found a good doctor. It seems the other doctors were not to your standards. Make sure he offers best services. I wish you all the best.


    42 years ttc. I feel that is a bit unrealistic. This is the reason the doctor told you to go for egg or embryo donation. You are healthy regarding to what you have just shared. The problem is that you cannot keep the pregnancy. But your eggs are fertile enough. So what have you been doing all along that you are trying now to have a baby? It is always said that it is good to have a baby before 35 years. At your age. You should be looking for the 5th child or something like that. But anyway, taht is none of my business. So what I can advise you just go for surrogacy. It could have been better if you used donor eggs too. There are many risks that comes with using your eggs at such an age. Your grandma might have managed to be pregnant at 52 but taht does not mean it will be applicable to you too. Furthermo0re. I bet that child has some issues too.


    Now at the age of 43 i am married again to someone else and we want a baby off our own.
    I founded many clinics regarding surrogacy and i picked up the few clinics too for further discussion with them.
    I contacted many clinics and told them every aspect of our complications.
    From my last marriage i had many complications regarding pregnancy.
    Like i was facing miscarriages every time i conceived.
    I know at this age it is quite difficult to have a baby off my own womb.
    Keeping in mind all the complications regarding pregnancy now i think i should go for some other option to have children.
    So i persuaded my husband to go for surrogacy to have our own children.
    He agreed to my proposal so i started looking for clinics with good surrogacy records.
    But i’m worried about many other aspects like my behaviour towards the baby after knowing everything.
    Like when the baby grows up what i should tell him/her.
    But now i don’t have any other options left so far so surrogacy is the only solution to my problems i guess.
    From their satisfied answers i guess some clinics are the best solution for having a baby.
    So i suggest that you people should also do your own research regarding surrogacy and should contact different clinics for further details.
    If someone is raising a baby from surrogacy method please share your experience with us so we can learn something from your experiences.


    Hi, Sammy. I hope you doing well. I think you’re not looking into what your problems exactly are. Both of your pregnancies resulted in MCs. Did you get yourself tested for this? Are you weak to carry a baby? Is your immune system weak? Do you have any health issues? You need to answer these questions to yourself. Now you’ve found a good doctor. So get yourself properly checked. Make sure that you understand your inner problems. Good luck!


    It is good that you never lost hope. I can completely understand how difficult it would have been for you and your husband to undergo such a difficult situation. I am in the same boat of struggle, I have been told that I have a poor ovarian reserve which means I have a very little chance of conceiving through IVF. Therefore, the clinic I am currently visiting has been like a life saviour and have been extremely supportive and have been positive as well. In your condition, it is basically difficult for you to keep the pregnancy. Therefore, what your doctor is suggesting might give you the chance and you should opt for it. Don’t worry things will get better with time. Feel free to ask any more questions and I will always be here for a support.


    I’m sharing my journey of Surrogacy with you.
    I’m basically from Japan we are settled in Japan from past few years.We are happily married.I’m totally infertile now as i had hysterectomy cancer and as i result i am infertile now. But my husband was there with me every time. Than we searched about surrogacy and found it best solution for us.
    As Japan has banned surrogacy so we moved to Europe to find our dream come true.Than we moved to Ukraine as we heard there are many good clinics regarding surrogacy in Ukraine.In Ukraine we found BioTexCom and consulted them.They helped us to find a good surrogate mom.Now she is pregnant with our twin daughters.We are very excited about having two daughters.We are so thankful to the clinic.The surrogates mom are kind they let us have our dream come true.
    Share your stories too

    Joanne Silvia

    Hello Sammy. Hope you’re doing well. Your story is really heartbreaking. It tore me up a bit emotionally. You need to remember, whatever happens, you will always have alternative options. I still do not know what exactly went wrong in your case. Maybe the problem is with carrying a child. You are fertile, so there’s definitely no problems there. Age is not on your side. I would suggest you surrogacy. Surrogacy is perfect for you. You wouldn’t have to go through the stress of pregnancy. Which you don’t want to, again, trust me. I’ve had miscarriages too. Do consider it. It’s actually ideal for you.

    Felicia Saz

    Hey, Sammy. Your story was heartbreaking. It must have been very hard for you to get over those miscarriages. We all know that it gets harder to conceive a child with age. You are 43 now. Getting pregnant at this age has its risks. It is not just risky for you. It can be risky for the child too. This can bring a lot of complications. I think you should try surrogacy for yourself. I had my son through surrogacy. I was 40 at that time. He is 10 months old now. My surrogate was a much younger and healthy girl. This really came as a blessing for you. You should try it too. You can go to Ukraine for it. Surrogacy there is very affordable. They even give you a guarantee of a baby.


    I can’t help thinking that you don’t battle enough. The main issue for your situation is keeping the pregnancy. You had two pregnancy and lost both in an unnatural birth cycle. I surmise that ought to be the focal point of everything. Why the unsuccessful labour. Is some kind of problem with your insusceptible framework or something? Or on the other hand, your uterus can’t keep an infant. You have a lot of things to ask yourself, dear. In spite of the fact that there are different options that you can take after. Be that as it may, it could have been exceptional in the event that you truly knew where the issue lies. At that point from that point, you can centre around finding the arrangement. the best option is surrogacy to the extent I looked into.


    Greetings, hun. I trust you did admirably. I believe you’re not investigating what your issues precisely are. Both of your pregnancies end up with miscarriages. Did you go for a checkup? It is safe to say that you are weak to conceive a child? Do you have any medical problems? You have to get answer of these inquiries. Presently you’ve discovered a decent specialist. So get yourself appropriately checked. Ensure that you comprehend your internal issues. Good fortunes!

    Jess bling

    I am shocked to read your story. Fertility does run in your family. See it is fine that you wanna try again. I am glad you have a cooperative doctor now. It is essential to get guidance on the rath path. I hope everything goes in your favor.Personally, I think I might be dangerous to carry a baby. You might be able to get pregnant but carrying it and delivering it is the job. Since you are fertile, you can look up for gestational surrogacy. It means that a surrogate can carry your baby for you.


    Hi love, glad to see you here. your presence here has really filled me up with pleasure and hope. I always like those persons who continue sharing their problems with others. This is your greatness that due to your post many others will get their answers too. Well, as I think, infertility is the major issue that people of elder age are facing. It may be due to many reasons may be known or unknown. Mostly, eggs tend to lose their fertility with the passage of time. when a woman reaches the age more than 40 then it is always hard for them to conceive. Besides, at a very young age, ladies get involved in extensive intercourse due to which they use to take birth control pills. These pills can stop pregnancy at that time but also have some side effects which are responsible for infertility. Also, infertility may be occurring due to some accident or genetic disease. Science has suggested some meaningful solutions like surrogacy for such problems. Surrogacy involves a surrogate mother who carries intended parents’ child. success rates in surrogacy are also very high. Hence, I will suggest you go for surrogacy if you feel difficulty in conceiving. Best wishes!

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